okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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