I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
