Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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