I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I am mentally ready for anal.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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