I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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