she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Green mimosas i think yes
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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