Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize