Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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