I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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