This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
How external is "for external use only"?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
