I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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