On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
