did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I just pynch a tree in the face
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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