Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize