i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
