THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
