They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Randomize
