They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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