You work out of a Hotel?
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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