I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
