The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize
