just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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