I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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