She is in my trunk
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize