My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Randomize