Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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