I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
there is glitter all over my balls
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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