i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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