I'm really into asian looking animals
Having a random hookup so left but love u
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
it hurts more in the daytime
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
