Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize