I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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