dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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