Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
