yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
