google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
There was a lot of him and a little penis
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
