I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
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