Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
