I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
