8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
