Im at strip club and am horny
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
NoShamevember. You game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize