I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize