She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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