think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Randomize
