oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
