Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
