Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize
