Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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