Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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