i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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