In the future we'll all be gay
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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