I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
