What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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